Feature Story: What If the Behavior Isn't the Whole Story?
When one of my boys was a baby, he screamed.
And I mean SCREAMED. 😂
I'm pretty sensitive to sound, so you can imagine how that went.
Then one day, I was standing in my kitchen, and I noticed something strange.
I felt... calmer.
And I couldn't figure out why.
Nothing particularly wonderful had happened. Life wasn't suddenly less busy.
Then it hit me...He'd learned to talk.
He wasn't screaming all the time anymore because now he had WORDS! 😂
Fast forward about ten years, and that boy still has plenty to say.
He's a talker. A BIG talker.
And while he's gotten much better at managing his impulses, interrupting and knowing when to give people space are still things we're working on.
Sometimes he'll start interrupting me while I'm working with another child. Or he'll get into his brothers' business, trying to engage them when they're busy doing something else.
And I've noticed something about him over the years.
Using his voice seems to help him settle.
Talking, making sounds, expressing himself out loud. It's something he naturally gravitates toward.
So instead of constantly saying, "Buddy, you need to stop talking," I started trying something different.
I'd say, "Hey buddy, why don't you find some songs to sing?"
And you know what?
It worked.
Instead of continuing to interrupt or bother his brothers, he'd happily redirect himself to singing.
And now I get to listen to my boy singing worship songs around the house. ❤️
It's honestly so sweet.
Me and this cutie at the beach where he can be as loud as he wants.
But here's what I want you to notice.
I didn't stop teaching him not to interrupt.
He still needs to learn that other people need space, that conversations have boundaries, and that there are appropriate times to talk.
But instead of only focusing on stopping the behavior, I started paying attention to what might be underneath it.
And that CHANGED how I responded.
Because sometimes the behavior we're trying so hard to STOP is giving us information we haven't learned to recognize yet.
This is true in our homeschool days, too.
The child who keeps getting up from the table.
The one who melts down when it's time for math.
The one who seems to need our attention every five minutes.
Sometimes they need a boundary. Sometimes they need more support. And sometimes something about the way we're approaching the situation needs to change.
The goal isn't to excuse every behavior. It's to get curious enough to respond to what's actually happening.
And sometimes, that one shift makes a world of difference. ❤️
P.S. I've been working on something for the homeschool mom who feels like she's constantly putting out fires, changing schedules, and wondering why her days still feel so hard. I'll have more to share soon. ❤️
🛠️ FEATURED TOOL: Exact Words to Stop Homeschool Meltdowns
Ever know your child is heading toward a meltdown, but suddenly you can't think of what to say?
Especially when you're getting frustrated yourself? 😅
That's why I created Exact Words to Stop Homeschool Meltdowns (Before They Spiral).
It's a $12 collection of simple, ready-to-use scripts to help you recognize when your child's brain is getting overwhelmed, respond before things escalate, and even recognize when YOU need a reset.
Because sometimes we know what we want to do differently.
We just need help finding the words in the moment. ❤️
Managing the Chaos with Joy: Homeschooling a Big Family + Daily Life
Are you a few months into your homeschool year and already feeling stretched thin? 😅
Between the interruptions, the never-ending to-do list, and trying to meet everyone's needs, it's easy to feel like you're constantly playing catch-up.
I wanted to bring back an older livestream because the encouragement and practical tools are just as relevant today.
We talk about why homeschool moms get so overwhelmed, what to do when you find yourself snapping at your kids, and how to simplify your days with rhythms that actually work for your family.
And one of my favorite reminders?
You don't have to figure out everything today. Just the next right thing. ❤️
Come enjoy an afternoon of play and connection with other homeschool families!
Serenity Park is a hidden gem with tons of climbing structures, a water feature, and a covered area. We’ll be there rain or shine! 🌦️
📅 Wednesday, October 21
⏰ 12:00–3:00 PM
📍 7360 SW Pointer Rd, Portland, OR 97225
A few things to know: 🚗 Parking: Park along SW Pointer Road. You won’t see the playground from the road, so you’ll need to walk in! Please be mindful of the neighbors when parking. 🚻 No bathrooms! There are no public restrooms, so plan accordingly. 🥪 Bring: Lunch or snacks, water, and weather-appropriate clothing.
Come for the whole afternoon or just stop by when you can! There’s no agenda, just kids playing and moms connecting.
Whether you’re already homeschooling or just thinking about it, you’re welcome to join us! ❤️
🐛 Buzzkill: A Wild Wander Through the Weird and Threatened World of Bugs by Brenna Maloney AGES 8–13
My boys have checked this one out from the library over and over again.
And honestly, that's usually one of the best endorsements a book can get in our house. 😂
This book explores the strange, fascinating world of insects, including their unusual abilities, the important jobs they do in nature, and why some species are in trouble.
It's full of the kind of weird bug facts that make kids stop and say, "MOM! DID YOU KNOW?!"
I love books that help kids see something ordinary in a completely different way. Bugs are everywhere, but there's SO much happening in their little world that we don't normally notice.
If you have a kiddo who loves insects, nature, or collecting random science facts, this is a great one to grab.
🧠 Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended on It by Chris Voss with Tahl Raz OLDER TEENS — ADULT BOOK, PREVIEW FIRST
Okay, this one is definitely NOT a children's book.
But my logic-driven, ahem, argumentative firstborn LOOOVVED it. 😂
It's written by a former FBI hostage negotiator who shares what he learned about communication, listening, and negotiation from real hostage situations.
And my teen was fascinated.
He kept coming to tell me what he'd learned and was clearly feeling pretty empowered by all his newfound knowledge.
What I appreciate is that negotiation isn't just about winning an argument. The book explores things like listening carefully, asking better questions, understanding someone's perspective, and recognizing what's happening beneath the words they're saying.
Those are valuable skills, especially for a kid who already loves logic and debate!
A heads-up for parents: This book includes real hostage situations, threats, and other adult subject matter. I would absolutely review it before handing it to your teen.
But if you have an older kid who's fascinated by psychology, communication, or figuring out how people think, this might be a surprising hit.
🐯 What About Worms!? by Ryan T. Higgins AGES 4–7
My 6-year-old brought this one over and wanted to read the whole thing to me.
And it turned out to be such a fun reading experience!
It's about a tiger who isn't afraid of anything... except worms. 😂
The story is silly, the illustrations are expressive, and there's plenty of opportunity for kids to have fun with the characters' voices.
That's actually what I loved most about listening to my son read it.
He wasn't just practicing decoding words. He was experimenting with inflection, expression, and making the story sound funny.
And those are reading skills too!
Sometimes we get so focused on whether our beginning readers can read the words correctly that we forget there's another part of reading: learning to make the story come alive.
This is a great one for newer readers who are ready to practice reading aloud with a little personality.
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